It's been a while.

Photo of me by Nathan Fleming of finetuned.ca

What a year 2020 has been.

It's hard to even know where to begin. This year has felt like many years all wrapped up in one.

From starting 2020 hopeful and determined to overcome neurological deficits, to my spouse miraculously surviving a massive heart attack, to COVID-19 lockdown, to learning how to ask for help and receiving incredible support from family/friends, to being renovicted and moving during the pandemic, to returning to work, to getting a new part-time job, to burning out in only 2 months and making the difficult decision to hand in my resignation.

What a roller coaster!

Just last week I saw my neurologist for the first time since the crazy MS relapse. She was surprised to hear I was attempting to work at all and was not surprised to hear how much I was struggling with it.

At this appointment I learned that aside from some inflammation reducing, my MRI has not improved. My brain is in the same condition as July of 2019.

Despite looking normal and being able to function with a little bit more ease due to adapting- It makes sense that I'm still dealing with vertigo, spasms in my face causing drooping of the left side, cognitive problems such as high sensitivity to over-stimulation, numbness, tingling, and so much more.

Looking normal is one of my biggest obstacles these days. In fact; I have become such a master at seeming like nothing is wrong that I convinced myself I was well enough to work a part-time job. Then I convinced an employer and entire team! And then I burnt out after only 2 months on the job.

While I am proud of my very enthusiastic attempt at working- I knew I needed to leave the part-time job to return to taking full-time care of myself. It was with great sadness that I handed in my resignation just yesterday.

What does this mean for me, now?

Back to the drawing board! Quite literally. I've decided that this is the time for me to stay committed to my artistic practice. I'm not "giving up", by any means. I'm refocusing on the priority of keeping well. My neurological health is number one.

2020 has been bittersweet. I want to THANK YOU for all the love my art has been getting. With now being a full-time artist, your support is appreciated even more than ever. That being said...

My shop is now updated with currently available paintings!

❤ Fiona